Friday, 4 May 2012

God's gonna turn you gay

I was going to post a blog about misinterpretation of scripture tonight, but while doing a bit of research I came across this really interesting verse from The Bible:

"Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones.In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion."
- Romans 1:26-27

Now as far as I'm aware, this is the only part of the Bible which deals with homosexuality amongst women in addition to men, so that's something it has going for it. In addition, it also appears to condemn sexual attraction between people of the same gender, in addition to it's usual crusade against 'sexual relations' between same-sex couples.

Anyway, this goes back to Verse 21, where it's explained that, while they knew of God, they didn't worship him or do whatever else he wants people to do for him. They gave up the immortal lord for animals and birds and reptiles (or just... well, animals). That's when God gave people over to supposed shameful lusts. In other words, when he made them gay.

This is an insane way of retaliating against people who don't worship you; and I'll be honest, it had me on the floor laughing. God will curse you with gay feelings! FEAR HIM!

Perhaps the strangest thing about it all is how it goes directly against every idea of Free Will presented in The Bible. Your will isn't really free when God has absolutely no issue with playing around with your capacity to make decisions. It defeats the idea of repentance a little as well, if you're forcing people to be gay, aren't you destroying any hope they have of entering heaven? In any case, I think this passage will being going down as one of my favourite ludicrous stories in The Bible.

At moments like this, I almost wish I could believe in God. I'd quite like him to work his fabulous magic on a few people.


  1. I love how you assume that Justin Bieber is gay...

  2. I never suggested such things :D